The final straw... Hemorrhoid can go to Hell.

For the first time in my life i have broken my silence...to Hemorrhoid.

Until now, she has never known the real reason why my weight has yo-yo'd up and down for the past 10 years. Her belief is that i just love eating too much sweet food and i don't run enough. Remember, she told me yesterday that "Diet has nothing to do weight-loss".

It all came about this morning whilst i having breakfast. She made a comment about my sis not losing weight fast enough and wasting away her gym membership. And of course i put in my 2 cents worth of info and told her again, its about the food choices and not the exercises. She had to shut me down in 5 seconds flat and tell me i was lying.

So i thought i'd be smarter this time and talk to her from a different angle. I told her her that people who binge eat are using food as an outlet to numb the pain of emotional issues that they are not dealing with well.eg. Stress, abuse (verbal!), depression etc. People whom are overweight/obese don't get that way cos they LOVE food so much, but because for that moment they are eating it- they get the serotonin release, the feel good factor, and in that moment all their worries ceases. So when they feel like their world is going to end, they turn to food, their safety net.

And you know what i got told. "Don't talk crap to me. Fat people are just lazy."
I said, "You have no idea what they are going through."
She said, "What would you know, you are 'just a rep'?" (she doesn't consider my profession a 'real job' as i'm not a physio/doctor or pharmacist)
Me, "When you harrass us about our weight, calling us fat and worthless, how do you think that makes us feel?"
She said, "Well someones got to tell you before you waste your life away."
Me, "You just don't get it. Don't you know how nasty that is?"
Her, "Well its the truth, you spend too much time at that gym. Grow up and get on with your life".

That was it, she crossed the line.

By now i was filled with rage and the tears were welling up.

All i said was, "When you started telling me i was fat in grade 10 (i was far from that, i was 5f 6 and 52kg jammed packed full of muscles), you ruined my fuckin life. I've been dealing with depression for 9 years so don't you tell me that weight issues are not emotional problems and have nothing to do with food!"

I didn't wait for an answer. I stormed out of the kitchen and went to my room and started typing this. I'm still a mess and in tears.What a cold hearted bitch, i dont' understand why she can be so fuckin horrible.

She might be my blood but she will NEVER be my family.