Sunday, February 28, 2010

The final straw... Hemorrhoid can go to Hell.

For the first time in my life i have broken my Hemorrhoid.

Until now, she has never known the real reason why my weight has yo-yo'd up and down for the past 10 years. Her belief is that i just love eating too much sweet food and i don't run enough. Remember, she told me yesterday that "Diet has nothing to do weight-loss".

It all came about this morning whilst i having breakfast. She made a comment about my sis not losing weight fast enough and wasting away her gym membership. And of course i put in my 2 cents worth of info and told her again, its about the food choices and not the exercises. She had to shut me down in 5 seconds flat and tell me i was lying.

So i thought i'd be smarter this time and talk to her from a different angle. I told her her that people who binge eat are using food as an outlet to numb the pain of emotional issues that they are not dealing with Stress, abuse (verbal!), depression etc. People whom are overweight/obese don't get that way cos they LOVE food so much, but because for that moment they are eating it- they get the serotonin release, the feel good factor, and in that moment all their worries ceases. So when they feel like their world is going to end, they turn to food, their safety net.

And you know what i got told. "Don't talk crap to me. Fat people are just lazy."
I said, "You have no idea what they are going through."
She said, "What would you know, you are 'just a rep'?" (she doesn't consider my profession a 'real job' as i'm not a physio/doctor or pharmacist)
Me, "When you harrass us about our weight, calling us fat and worthless, how do you think that makes us feel?"
She said, "Well someones got to tell you before you waste your life away."
Me, "You just don't get it. Don't you know how nasty that is?"
Her, "Well its the truth, you spend too much time at that gym. Grow up and get on with your life".

That was it, she crossed the line.

By now i was filled with rage and the tears were welling up.

All i said was, "When you started telling me i was fat in grade 10 (i was far from that, i was 5f 6 and 52kg jammed packed full of muscles), you ruined my fuckin life. I've been dealing with depression for 9 years so don't you tell me that weight issues are not emotional problems and have nothing to do with food!"

I didn't wait for an answer. I stormed out of the kitchen and went to my room and started typing this. I'm still a mess and in tears.What a cold hearted bitch, i dont' understand why she can be so fuckin horrible.

She might be my blood but she will NEVER be my family.


  1. good job for speaking up. it's hard to be that way with someone who is your family, but i've also had the "privelege" of basically dis-owning a family member for the way they are, and it sucks. But in the end, you HAVE to protect yourself and she is obviously a very negative person in your life. If you ever need to talk, feel free to e-mail me

  2. Hugs, hugs, hugs to you my beautiful friend. It is times like this that talking through a computer is extremely difficult. Being a mum myself (and having a daughter too) I can not for the life of me understand why your mum behaves this way. It is so cruel what she says to you and ever so hurtful. I think you hit the nail on the head though with your explanation to her. She does seem to be the root of all evils in your life and the cause of all your unhappiness. How does your sis handle her?

    I feel so sad for you Chelle and I just want to reach out and tell you that you are a gorgeous, strong, independent woman. You are not a child anymore and you are not that girl from grade 10 have grown in an opposite direction to that which has been modelled to you. And you need to be commended for that!

    Rise above her Chelle, you are definitely the better person and always will be, try not to let her bring you down to her level.

    Smile chicky, it works wonders!!! Thinking of you!! xxoo

  3. sorry to hear you have been upset by your Hemorrhoid again. Hopefully you have left her with something to think about. It is hurtful, cruel and degrading to have someone nag or make comments about people having trouble with their weight. Good for you on making a stand.

  4. Hey Chelle,
    Sorry to hear about your relationship with your mum, I too am at a loss as to how your mum could say these things to you, I cant imagine how painful that would be for you, the damage would have most definately been done with those sorts of comments coming from anyone let alone your own mother as you were growing up....all I can do is offer you my support in saying you are a wonderful strong person, who is full of happiness, support for others & positivity towards your own healthy lifestyle....the sooner you get your own place & are not surrounded by negativity the better off you will be.
    Hugs to you, Leanne x

  5. Sorry to hear you had such a shitty day. Hopefully you will be in your own place soon. Have a great week next week.

  6. So...Diet doesn't matter, you have to exercise more but going to the gym is a waste of time? No wonder you can't win!
    Chin up lovely girl! Its a shame you need her approval for your new place, but you're almost there :)

  7. Wow... What a bitch.. haha.
    Four words... "Get the FUCK out!" You need your own place.
    Hope you're feeling better. Nieve, miserable shit heads like that just seem to want to love starting a fight. Sounds to me like the sooner you're out of there the better.